getting closer

i really thought this would get easier by now. he's only 11 hours away still at home in La. and im so blah. all i want to do is lay in bed and cry all the time. we've been arguing so much lately. especially ever since i left last friday. ugh i wanna scream and i want him back in NC only 4 hours away. :( ... 

this deployment its getting closer. i've heard from several people that the anticipation leading up to the deployment is worse than the deployment itself. and that it goes by so quickly. im praying they are right.
i know i have to stay strong, and no matter how hard it gets. i will NOT give up. i refuse to give up on him, on  us, and our future.  

i do have lots of things planned while he's gone to go back to school, lose weight, get another job, and get my shit together for when he comes back. i gotta make him proud of me. and everything i do is going to be because of him. he's definately my insperation and motivation ... i dont know what id do without him <3

mmmm my baby is so sexy :)

i absolutely ADORE this picture of him. he's so damn cute. i absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE his smile and i think thats going to be one thing i miss the most :(